Am I Ready to Become a Hat Daughter?

The champion Fancy Hat Daughter. Photograph: Max Mumby/Indigo/Getty Images

In that location are few problems a hat can't fix. It can hide bad bangs and grown-out quarantine haircuts. Information technology can help disguise oneself in public. Every bit my unwashed pilus and I slowly return to society, I am asking myself an important question: Am I prepared to let hats become my entire personality? If you also wish to embark on this Hat Girl journey, fasten your fedora and come with me.

Lid Girls, like hats themselves, come in all unlike kinds. The queen? She's a Fancy Hat Girl. Samantha from Sex activity and the City? A Horny Lid Girl. Have you lot e'er seen Santa without a hat? A Seasonal Chapeau Girl through and through.

There is a hat for every occasion: baseball hats, bucket hats, trucker hats, tiptop hats, itty-bitty costume hats. There are giant floppy hats to aid you knock over drinks at brunch. There are chef hats for when y'all need to whip upward a quick ratatouille, cowboy hats to embrace your yeehaw energy, visors for volleyball and condign Guy Fieri. All hats are good hats, except for the pink mesh newsboy chapeau I asked my grandma to get me in 2004. That was heinous on every level.

With and so much happening everywhere all the time, I detect myself yearning for something simple, something distracting, something I can point to and say, "Oh, this? Information technology'due south but my very prominent hat." Call up that in one case Pharrell wore a huge hat to the Grammys and it was all we talked most for weeks? I am non just looking for a statement piece — I desire my hat to be the whole conversation.

Time is a concept Hat Girls needn't abide. It is summer whenever you wear a dominicus hat. It is the 1800s if you put on a stovepipe hat. Halloween starts whenever you clothing a witch's hat and ends when yous take it off considering someone was like, "Isn't it August?" Besides, keeping track of fourth dimension is for Spotter Guys. Then I guess the real question is exercise yous want to live your life with regrets, or practice yous want to wear a big cool chapeau?

Am I Ready to Go a Hat Girl?